My secret love “Muzik”
makes me smile , in the silence
makes me cry, with those violins
touches my heart with the guitars
can’t see him as he’s so far.
takes away my pains & heels my sorrows
relaxes my senses and makes a better tomorrow.
turns me on with his rhythm & blues,
tries to touch my soul with the spiritual views.
makes me burn on the dance floor,
makes me lose control with the loud roar,
breaks my head and bang it hard,
when the rock ‘n’ roll and metal goes apart
and the hip-hop beats to shake and spin around
with the drum beats driving wicked and surround.
takes my breath away with the good old classics,
which makes the air goes so romantic
and the base goes running along
across the southern rock with the country so longed.
and the jazz and reggae comes in action
with the sweetness and sun tans goes in attraction.
he has taught me so much about life
that i know i can make myself no more strive.
i can feel him in my ears,
he can’t with all those gears.
i can’t see him anywhere,
even though he catches me everywhere.
He is immortal and never bids goodbye,
but i sometimes have to fall short and go so shy.
he’s always with me, my lips, my nerves n my senses
but my eyes keeps searching for him in those shells.
when he’s all packed in boxes so heavy
and cluttered in the wires so thin and wavy
i can’t see him ever cause the man i am talking about in this whole story
is “Muzik” ..
I wrote this little piece way back in my graduation days..once when i used to be much of a active-music-lover/follower. I developed much of the taste from my radio addiction..offline that days, while now we all have loads of apps and online technologies to hear the fresh and record breaking artists from national, international or even regional artists. So as i was telling you all about my love for this area, which somehow have taken a backstage lately, since i m cut short on my leisure fun time to more of a serious studious kinds. I slowly and gradually realized to myself when i fist start going to the college once again last year, life has kind of turned topsy-turvy, and been turned upside down from dull n boring to interesting yet roller-coaster kind of a ride for me.
Being from a technical background, i hardly had any plans to continue much on the academics and studies, until i realized that i was deeply saddened and much of a failure in my real life, as a responsible human-being, female, daughter, sister, friend and the list just goes on. What i never understood was a bitter fact of life that, the journey never stops unless your mind stops talking and your heart beats come to a nil on that graph and your body had stopped working and died from inside out. I realized a fact, that i had been trying much too hard to achieve something which was kind of really hard to achieve in this life-time, failing to finally succeed in any of my attempts on any of the competitive exams and getting somewhere good making a stable career for myself.
So finally last year i made up my mind to give this last dive in to the mess of examinations, applying for a Bachelors in Education course at a well reputed university of our national capital. The only course entrance exam form i had applied, a solo one, and had this misinformation, i.e; only 200 seats for the course, which happened to be applied for another university. I tried for a few more universities, with the leading ones, but failed to go ahead due to some issues. So 10th may-2015, we had our common entrance test, with my center somewhere in the south location. The results were out on 19th, and i somehow tried avoiding to check instead having a misconception for the seat/student ratio for the concerned university. I remember very clearly i was sad on life not turning out even close to what i had planned for. I didn’t check it on 19th and went online a day later, seeing the best to my eye had ever believed. I stood at a rank 1310, to which at first, i jumped out of my seat in a feeling of joy and fiesta, but again, held myself back due to the wrong info, checking that list where the ranks had gone as high as somewhere 7200s. I was not just happy for the rank i had got, but only to the fact, that i stood at a good position somewhere, without so much of hard-work that i had put in for cracking my AIEEE, and other entrances. Perhaps, that’s what we call “destiny“, and now i absolutely believe and have utmost faith in this word.
Since i stepped to this new platform of my life embracing all the good things of life and the simple pleasure of being happy with small steps of climbing a mountain and a never ending journey of give and take, known as the world of Teaching and learning, the world of Education, it gives me immense pride and tonnes of good-feelings, hope, wisdom and optimistic attitude to face life with great confidence and a path of self-discovery. I am a student of B.Ed.(2015-2017), FIMT, Guru Gobind Singh Indraprastha University, Delhi.
The poem above was a presentation i was suppose to give individually for my practical subject assignment. And below is a picture of some of my new friends/classmates/teachers/guide and counselors.
As i continue writing about my story as a writer, who isn’t established anywhere, except in my own little devilish grave top-shelf, i would like to present a few of my poems here in sometime. My first poem as i had already told you, was written over a trivial issue, somehow close to my heart and mind, which i came down by my secret weapon of choice, known as the “pen to paper”. Although a bit sad and melancholic it was when i was scratching my head with all the worldly issues going around those times and still somehow prevails in all of our lives. And so i started up with a few short ones and some full fledged heart touching ones. Since i was much into the movies they used to show on our television sets, i was a sci-fi and space movie fanatic.
So turning back to this present moment, when i am back to the college days, being enrolled in a course related to the education industry, somehow feeling this strong urge to bring about some much needed enlightenment across the kids and the youth in this era, and making some change in our country. With my first year nearing to its end in the month of May-June, i have learned so much about life and myself as a whole till now.
In the first semester we learned quite a few techniques and methodologies about the various subjects under the teaching-learning process. I being an engineering graduate, found psychology a bit tricky to learn and understand until i just made myself comfortable, sitting back and studied with full focus for getting to know the various things and images we get to make while taking a good look over a lesson. The psyche a person plays a vital role in understanding an individual, which totally defines him/her on the outer as their personality or the body language, the way they present themselves, either verbally or non-verbally(eye movements, sign-language, etc). Then the other subject we learned was very much related to a person’s life on how it gives and presents on their various attributes such as the physical, mental, moral, character, social, emotional, intellectual, etc..helping an individual in their individual development, giving them a perspective-philosophy. the other important subjects of learning were those from the fields of school organization, discipline, language and understanding of one’s strengths and weaknesses.
The best part being one of the learners here, at college under the school of education after a long gap of around 5 years was getting back to the youth, the era where i loved being the most. As a student in one of the top universities among the national capital, i liked the people, my fellow classmates, the new environment, some great teachers and professors from various backgrounds and walks of life. I rose back from my bad days just in time and made myself comfortable, getting into the flow. I was slowly and gradually making pace and speeding up for getting updated on my areas of expertise and the knowledge of-course.
So, while being there, during the first semester we had a few subjects in which we dealt with writing plethora of texts and journals, reviews, autobiography, all enclosed under an e-portfolio. This digital copy i somehow enjoyed the most since it made me awaken and get all fast track knowledge and database under the computer literacy skills. I learned how to google search and make meaning of the data, made use of google drive, saving all my home-assignments and work in a well organized fashion. Mostly, i had this great opportunity to learn and get my hands on the right part of texting by Microsoft office, with the presentation(making a electronic means of lesson plan for the smart classes), the Microsoft word(where i typed most of my journals and the reports of our school work), and somehow also learnt to experiment with all of my work or writing skills in order to make the best possible presentation. Coming next would be a few of my poems which i wrote in the college days on the occasion of teachers day, and also a few of my old ones.